I was in the early stages of being stay at home mom and military spouse. I couldn’t go to mommy and me programs/meetings because I couldn’t drive. Too scared and ashamed I took to the net searching for others. Hoping to find some support during this time of life.
I tried Blogger and got locked out of Tumblr. So to WordPress I came with my hopes and dreams. I wanted to find a community that didn’t judge me for being different.
I couldn’t breast feed because the stress just couldn’t keep up. I was ashamed that I looked at the breast pump and couldn’t get it. Shouldn’t there be some support group for this? I dealt with the shame of going to the hospital nurse for advice to feed my own baby. I tried the teas to help me relax and make milk. I even watched things to just relax.
At one point I was visiting my family and broke down crying because I felt like a bad mom. My my mom soothed my worries by telling me I wasn’t the only person to go through this. She advised me to to continue the breast milk and formula combination and do my best. That was exactly what I did.
Outside of a few close people I didn’t share the ups and downs of motherhood. Thinking I was the only one I decided to journal as much as I could remember so I could share with others hoping to find a someone that could get me.